Tuesday, October 16, 2012

On Strike!

I have finally had enough of my children's attitude of entitlement.  I've tried not to spoil my kids.  They have chores and expectations, just like I did as a kid.  They get time outs and spankings when needed too.  It has gotten to a boiling point though.

As I mentioned to them on Saturday, I spend every moment of my life doing EVERYTHING for all four of them.  There is one of me.  I haul them to practices, recitals, games, competitions, etc.  I plan activities for them I think they'll find enjoyable.  I plan trips/vacations for them that I think they will want to do.  In short, my life revolves around my kids.

I'm not complaining.  I knew that it would before they ever arrived her.  And, honestly, I'm happy that it does.  I'd give my kids everything if it was possible.  However, attitudes of any kind (especially one of entitlement) and disrespect just aren't going to fly around here.

Today I reached my last straw.  It came after helping at the book fair at the kids' school.  Nash had had a melt down in the book fair because, heaven forbid, I was holding his wallet which had a whopping 30 cents in it while he took his AR tests (we all know how much there is to buy at a book fair for 30 cents, right?).  After he finally quit that and we got out of the book fair, I asked him to haul a nearly empty box to the truck that I had hauled in (full) for work.  He carried it from the library to the first grade doors (not far from where the truck was parked).  He was about to drop the box and asked if someone else would take it.  My hands were full of my other work items, I was holding keys & needed to open the door quickly since it was raining outside.  I asked Sam to carry the box.  She actually put her hands behind her back, looked at Nash & I, and said, "No."  Yea, not my proudest mother moment.  My response was, "Fine.  Don't ask me for anything."  I grabbed the box from Nash (with my arms still full) and in her second of realization of what she had done, she also reached for the box to carry it.  I told her, "Nope.  Too late." took the box and walked out the door.  She sat in the school reveling in her moment of realization until she came to the conclusion that I was not walking back through the doors.  I made it to the truck, soaking wet, opened the door & threw my items in.  Nash hopped in and didn't close the door behind him because Samantha had finally showed up.  She proceeded to stand there, in the rain, with the truck door wide open, not moving.  I finally told her, "Either get in the truck or stand there and get hit with the door because I'm moving the truck."  She finally climbed in and slammed the door.  She went to the back of the truck, sat on her knees and faced backwards.  I repeatedly told her to put on her seat belt, which fell on deaf ears.  Once I reached the intersection a block from the school I refused to go any further until her seat belt was on - and I had to point out that a car was coming up behind us.  She finally did it.

After picking up the two little kids from daycare, I was tempted not to take Samantha to dance class.  The thing that got me was that I had paid this month's tuition and I hate to waste it.  They didn't get off scott free though.  All three of the kids (Caleb included because his behavior has been just as bad lately) had a chewing out of their life from Hyrum to the Maverick in Providence.  There was a lot of head hanging, nodding and avoiding eye contact.

I have declared myself to be on strike.  I told them they can do their own laundry, make their own meals, and get their own rides to places until they decide to start treating me with a bit of respect.  I'm tired of being treated like the live in maid.  It's high time these three spoiled kids learn that things in life aren't free and it feels good to earn something and treat others with respect.  Tonight when we got home from dance the two older ones disappeared downstairs for a bit.  When they came upstairs they made their own dinner (cereal), unloaded the dishwasher (together and without arguing who's job it was), and when they asked if they could have home lunch tomorrow I said, "If you make it." and arrangements were made between the two to make their lunches.  It will be interesting to see how long it keeps up and to see how long it takes for them to realize just how good they really do have it.  I don't recall it ever being ok to treat my mother the way I've been treated as of late.  I don't claim to be an angel, but I'm pretty sure my dad would have used a belt to clarify this topic if I had acted the way my kids have.  Here's to hoping.